Responding to uncomfortable stories

Sometimes people share in ways that leave us feeling uncomfortable, or they share things that are painful.

Here are some guidelines for how to respond to those situations:

• Try to identify what it was that upset you.
• Ask yourself how their sharing touched on (or differs from) your own experiences, beliefs or assumptions?
• Think about that person’s background and life; how might their experience of life have shaped the way they see things?
• Think how your own experiences have shaped the way you see things?
• Ask yourself if there is something you could learn from their perspective?
• It is very important not to judge or correct the sharer, or interrogate them about their choices or actions.

There may be a time where someone shares about a problem they have and you, as the leader, don’t feel able to help them. With their permission, refer them to a mature person or counsellor if needed.